The Fisherman Is Not Your Friend

Highlights of Week 1:

1. We lost our first game to the Seinaijoren Crocodiles 40-27 on Sunday. They are supposed to be the best team in the league, and are played in the Euro League as well as the Finnish Vaahteraliiga. When I say "best" team, it means they actually can fill out a complete roster, with different people starting at every position on either side of the ball. The level of play is about the equivalent to good high school or maybe even small college football. The Crocodiles had a good number of big guys and plenty of depth. In addition to playing LT all game, I was in on short-yardage defensive packages in the first half. In the 3rd a DT went out with a knee injury and I had to play the remainder of the game going both ways. The offense moved the ball well, but the defense had trouble stopping the other team's American RB, a speedy white kid for California. I jammed my thumb up pretty bad early in the game on defense, but the DE's I faced were so bad I had no problem playing with one hand. I managed a few tackles and forced fumble on defense. The coaches seemed happy with the team's performance, even though I felt it wasa pretty unorganized effort.

2. Sunday was my first real night out here and the beginning of culture overload. At first the differences are new, quirky, and interesting... but after a while it becomes a bit annoying, examples will come later. After the game, I meet up with some guys for dinner at a pizza buffet restaurant place.

Note on restaurants: Finnish people don't eat Finnish food. American restaurants dominate downtown Helsinki. Two of the most popular downtown chain are named Texas and Colorado. Kebab and Mexican restaurants make-up the majority of any other eating establishment that isn't a coffee shop.

Note on coffee shops:They are everywhere. I was told the Finish drink more coffee per capita then any other country in the world. Robert's Coffee and Wayne's Coffee (creative names) have the market cornered.

Back to Sunday. We started at a one of those Colorado restaurant and I order a beer. Anticipating a full glass of icy refreshment, I am handed a 16oz. glass that is 3/4 the way full. Assuming the friendly barkeep erred unintentionally, I smile and kindly inform him that my beverage is short of full. The next moments in broken english might make the remainder of the summer difficult for me.

Note on bars: Most pints are served in 20oz. glasses similiar to those at the pub. But THEY DON'T fill up the glass all the way. Finnish law requires automated draft systems that pour 12-16oz. of beer. All liquor drinks and glasses of wine must be pour through jiggers, freepouring is illegal. Flare-bartending is big here, and because they do not work for tips... bartenders take plenty of time flipping ice and bottles around before you get your damn drink. The are no well liquors, bottom-shelf whiskey is Johnny Walker red. Bars stay open until 4 a.m., which leaves a lot of late night time to drink. The drinking age limit is 18, but bars can set age limits keep young kids out of nicer bars and clubs.

After leaving a bar named Shakers, I ended up at a young person's club because the guys on the team I was with weren't old enough to get in the good club. The team is made of a variety of ages of guys, and these 19-22 guys are hilarious and crazy.

3.I moved into my apartment on Monday. It is a one room, not one bed room, ... ONE ROOM, apartment in Munnkineimi neighborhood about a 15 min tram ride NW of the city centre. About the size of a luxury prison cell, it was totally unfurnished, so I spent the remainder of the day setting it up with Team President who bought a carload of IKEA to make the place livable. But hey I am here for a 4 month vacation, not to have a killer pad... so I am not worried.

4.We practice 3 times a week. Tues, Thurs, and Friday, I was asked to help coach the women's full contact team, as well as the peewee kids team. I am trying to get paid for it but not sure if they can afford it here.

5.Played on Saturday this week and beat the Turku Trojans 37-34. The game wasn't really as close as the score makes it look. But the referees attempted to make the game as close as possible.

Note on refereeing:It is awful. I've heard every American who comes here as a big problem with the officiating and how bad it. They said an OL last year had like 5 holding penalty a game, and was ejected once for arguing. I understand that these refs have probably never played in their lives, and only learned the game recently, but basic rules are regularly misinterpreted, and judgement calls like pass interference and holding... forget about it. It is almost immpossible to play DB or OL in this leauge. The reason I got from a ref in the first game when I received a holding call, was "That is just not how to block in Finland" a position that is hard to argue with.

The DE I blocked most the game was an older guy who is "the best linebacker in Finnish history." He was supposed to be the best competition I'd see this year, but besides the headache I had from getting repeating hit in the head from his bullrushes, was all the damage he did. I guess I missed the weight I lost a bit, because I had to hunker down a bit more this week then last. I didn't play much defense this week, but I did have a sack, the team's first of the year.

6. I am righting this Sunday night. Pretty much everyone went out last night. One of the other OL is actually an English teacher and I went to dinner with him and his wife to a Finnish restaurant named Zetor, and it was actually the best meal I had here yet. Half chicken cooked in a foil bag with garlic, swede (not the Finnish much hated neighbors, but a sweet root vegatable) with sliced sauteed potatoes. Afterwards met up with a couple guys are Memphis (hotel bar), and then moved on to a Czech bar downtown named PRAHA. The rest of the night became a blur of the Budvar, (Czech lager, they say it was orginal Budweiser) and Fissou.

Note on Fissou: Think Jager and Rumplmintz, only more disgusting. Translates to Fisherman's Friend, yea... doesn't that make it sound even more enticing. I don't know how many rounds of that stuff we did. But between the 6 of us we finishing close to 2 bottles, and I still feel it coarsing through my veins.

Before I knew it, it was 4 a.m. I was on the way out the door, but the wanting to keep it going.

Note on late nights: They should be called early mornings here. The sun was up leaving the bar. I am not sure was happened the rest of the morning but I got home safe and sound, or as sound as the Fissou let me be.

I am sure I am leaving stuff out. But I miss you all and hope everything is well.

John.

Finnish have the best coffee and showers. Great water pressure and solid fixtures.